Sometime in late December, Saturn shifted, I’m told. My uncle sent me a message informing me of this. My uncle sent me a message informing me of this. I was compelled to read two digests of prophecies for 2012, by two different astrologers, (don’t ask; there are numerous icky aspects to this business of getting a salary every month) and both exulted about Saturn’s shift. Saturn, it seems, was the reason there 2011 comprised the spring, summer, autumn and winter of discontent. The Arab Spring, the girl in the blue bra, Gaddafi’s bloodied head, Mamata Banerjee, attacks upon and by “Maoists”, the 2G scam; basically, we can blame all bad things upon Saturn having sat where it was sitting till it shifted in late-December. “2012 is going to be much more positive,” said my friend who is an amateur astrologer, a tiny detail that was only recently revealed to me. With Saturn shifting, all sorts of good things would filter into my life and I would be awash with the rosy glow of happiness, I was told. “You’ll feel it very soon. Just wait for January. You’ll be totally overflowing with good cheer,” my friend told me.
It is January. I feel about as much cheer as them carollers on the left. In fact, you could say I feel rather distinctly saturnine, which is ironic since Saturn was supposed to make me all bouncy with optimism.
On the plus side, the fact that I look like a Vogon in a Fabindia skirt (and feel stupider) did throw up the opportunity of using that cartoon. That’s a smile-inducing thing, even if my life isn’t.
For those not familiar with Cage’s work, see here.